Two little limericks I wrote a while ago whilst going through an aspirational phase. Dwelling on the practicalities held me back. Zoo-loo I want to go live in a zoo Have lunch with a tiger or two As visitors pay It’s all on display So where would I go for a pooh? Reach For The Sky I want to go live in a tree Be mistress of all that I see I’d reach so high And touch the sky But where would I go for a pee? #writing #aspirational #limericks #poetry #humour #authors #humorous

I want to go live on the moon It really should happen quite soon My life is a mess With plenty of stress I need to get going by noon Dig Deep I think I’ll go live in a hole Dig down deep and act like a mole I’ll keep myself neat Pedicure my feet But my bum’ll be black as coal #writing #humor #aspirational #limericks #poetry #humour #authors #humorous #critique #iamwriting

The limericks roll up when I’m walking. Here’s three more. I would like to be topical, but that’s just not happening. Lulu Rocks Lulu is a girl who goes She shakes it down to her toes Her two left feet Are plates of meat But she rocks the adipose Long and Curly There was a young girl called Shirley Who’s teeth were white & pearly But down at her feet All folded up neat Was her tongue so long and curly Don’t Mess With May A fearsome old lady called May Insisted she had the las

I hadn’t planned to pull his head off. I bent and searched for body parts under the desk. “You’re an Action Man, for plastics sake,” I told him. “You’re supposed to hold it together.” I was still on my knees when Mr Krypton returned to his office. “Much as I approve of the attitude. What are you doing down there, Miss Light?” “It’s Bright, sir. One of your soldier dolls fell off the shelf.” “Not dolls. They’re valuable collectibles.” Yeah, right. Whatever. Krypton had a whole

Hats off to those who blog about writing and make it both interesting and relevant. What a challenge that is.  If I ever finish my novel, there may be something to contribute, but until then, It’s just going to be the odd limerick or two. Continuing the theme of confection, here we go… A greedy boy loved bubblegum Until it got stuck in his tum He fell to his knees Gave one mighty squeeze And it shot right out of his bum Miss Whippy A young lady loved walnut whips But they onl

I’ve moved on from sheep and cows to the hazards of sweets. There was a girl who Stole sweets And hid them inside her sheets One morning she woke And this is no joke Her hair was stuck to her feets Blow Up Rhoda There was a young girl named Rhoda Who loved American Soda She emitted a cough Got lost in the froth That soda it did implode her Pips On Her Hips A young lady ate sherbet pips With no thought at all to her hips A mouth of decay Was soon on its way And now she’s the s

I love writing limericks.  When you are searching for that elusive line or final punch, you can’t be worrying much about anything else.  I don’t know if they are in the correct format and I know nothing about poetry and rhyming feet.  They seem to have rhythm, but could be at the dancing dad end of  the scale for all I know. The first two are about sheep with a cow one at the end. Sam The Ram There was a young ram called Sam Who liked a nice girl called Pam Her love ran so de

Occasionally you hear an author say, “the book wrote itself.” Really? That’s as incredible as saying, “I knitted my own false teeth.” This writing business is hard and slippery. I started with enthusiasm and misplaced confidence. My first hurdle was tenses which slapped me round the face and said, “You really have no idea what to do with us.” Then I got all caught up with POV. I’ve settled for first person as I find it easier. Experts in my writers group say it is frown