A young man loved ping pong He also liked Mah Jong But what was lewd And oh so crude He’d only wear a thong. Call of Saul There was an old man called Saul Who had a shrill sort of call What’s he saying? Now he’s praying Oh, I think he’s trapped a ball #writer #humor #limericks #poetry #humour #authors #humorous #iamwriting

Two little limericks I wrote a while ago whilst going through an aspirational phase. Dwelling on the practicalities held me back. Zoo-loo I want to go live in a zoo Have lunch with a tiger or two As visitors pay It’s all on display So where would I go for a pooh? Reach For The Sky I want to go live in a tree Be mistress of all that I see I’d reach so high And touch the sky But where would I go for a pee? #writing #aspirational #limericks #poetry #humour #authors #humorous

I want to go live on the moon It really should happen quite soon My life is a mess With plenty of stress I need to get going by noon Dig Deep I think I’ll go live in a hole Dig down deep and act like a mole I’ll keep myself neat Pedicure my feet But my bum’ll be black as coal #writing #humor #aspirational #limericks #poetry #humour #authors #humorous #critique #iamwriting

The limericks roll up when I’m walking. Here’s three more. I would like to be topical, but that’s just not happening. Lulu Rocks Lulu is a girl who goes She shakes it down to her toes Her two left feet Are plates of meat But she rocks the adipose Long and Curly There was a young girl called Shirley Who’s teeth were white & pearly But down at her feet All folded up neat Was her tongue so long and curly Don’t Mess With May A fearsome old lady called May Insisted she had the las

I hadn’t planned to pull his head off. I bent and searched for body parts under the desk. “You’re an Action Man, for plastics sake,” I told him. “You’re supposed to hold it together.” I was still on my knees when Mr Krypton returned to his office. “Much as I approve of the attitude. What are you doing down there, Miss Light?” “It’s Bright, sir. One of your soldier dolls fell off the shelf.” “Not dolls. They’re valuable collectibles.” Yeah, right. Whatever. Krypton had a whole